Andy Warghoul


Um, Like Your Smile is Totally Ruling Me Right Now – Japanther

Starstruck – The Kinks

The Philosophy of The World – The Shaggs

The Chair That Squeeks – Rapture

Let’s Go Get Stoned – Ray Charles

Bees – Caribou

People, why aren’t you rioting in the streets? Before this year is over I may have to start some shit. For now, I am content to bake and eat too many cookies. I’m pissed though, make no mistake. I just watched a terrific program on art stuff, The Mona Lisa Curse. More specifically it was about the problems with contemporary art. My god it felt good to hear someone very intelligently say out loud what I have been thinking and boring people with for five years. However, it was very depressing. I had to look at dogs in halloween costumes for a full half hour to calm down from my state of completely rational but unfocused rage. I really wish I could use my words more gooder than I do, because I would be a great art critic. As it stands now shouting “FUCK this shit!” doesn’t cut it. Fuck you, shark in a tank. Fuck you unmade bed. Fuck you turd in a glass box. Fuck you Campbells fucking tomato fucking soup. You are symptoms of a fatal disease. Begone, thee horrid manifestations of empty minds and greedy pockets. Argh! Angst! Burn it all!

Phew.

Cookies.

Kara’s Favourite
MOCHA COOKIES
Makes 5 dozen

4 oz (4 squares) bittersweet chocolate
1½ cups semi-sweet chocolate chips
½ cup unsalted butter

4 eggs
1½ cups sugar

2 tablespoons instant expresso powder or instant coffee granules
2 tsp vanilla 3/4 cup flour ½ teaspoon baking powder
½ teaspoon salt 1½ cups semi-sweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350F. In a medium saucepan, slowly melt unsweetened chocolate, the first chocolate chips and butter over low heat, stirring occasionally, not allowing the mixture to bubble.

In a large mixing bowl, beat eggs, sugar and coffee granules until eggs are pale and yellow. Add vanilla.

Separately, stir together the dry ingredients. When the melted chocolate is smooth and still hot, fold it into egg mixture, then fold in flour mixture. Add the mini chocolate chips and stir. Let batter stand for 15 minutes.

To form cookies, use one spoon to scoop out about half a spoon of dough, a second spoon to scrape the dough onto a baking sheet, twelve cookies per sheet to allow for spreading.

Bake 8 – 10 minutes until puffed and shiny on top. Do not over bake.

Have you carved your turnip yet? No? You fail.

Wahaha! Sinister.
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Author: Kara Lalalala

I write this blog for my family cause I am terrible at letters & emails.

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