Ten Thousand Tyrones

Check out the new addition to the flat! A handful of hungry little fly trap babies. Look how beautiful these carnivorous bastards are, like dreamy green eyelashes. I noticed one of them is actually eating another, smaller one, so it’s actually a… CANNIBAL FLY TRAP! WAAAAAAAH! What horror.

John bought this and has loaned it to our window sill because due to a minor garbage accident in the garage our little basement flat is absolutely jam packed with flies… I’m sitting here writing this, covered in flies. I’m like a goddamn Ethiopian child all up in here, except my round belly is made from cheeseburgers and ice creams and not hopelessness and despair. It’s actually filling me with an incredible amount of anger, feeling their poopy little fly legs touch down on my skin every 4 1/2 seconds. AAAAAAHHHHH!

Our jalapeno pepper plant is growing really well! Soon we will have a pack of pickled peppers to pick.. peck.. whatever.. peck?? I dunno.

HEY want to see a pic of my little pickle?

So cute! In a month we might have, 5, maybe even 6 tiny pickles!

Meanwhile John’s just showing off with his garden. Look at that shit! It’s like a jungle in there!

And this is the second addition to our flat, care of John. A worm farm, full of 10,000 little worm friends! He has named every one of them Tyrone. A fine worm name, indeed.

Now we’re off to grab a THIRD new addition to the house, a real life garbage can. Fuck  you rats and cats, eating all our garbage. It’s OUR GARBAGE!

Peace out.


Author: Kara Lalalala

I write this blog for my family cause I am terrible at letters & emails.

2 thoughts on “Ten Thousand Tyrones”

  1. Great little garden! We haven’t quite gotten round to planting into the ground yet. So many big ideas, so little grunt. I’ve started seedlings now though so I have 2 to 3 weeks to dig in our garden. A deadline always helps. I can’t help laughing about your Tyrones. When we were traveling last year and traveling always seems to bring out talks on um…bowel movements, we called every bowel movement a Tyrone. “Tyrone wants to party, Tyrone called, Tyrone is a bad man….” it was funny until we met a guy called Tyrone on our travels. Well, actually, it was still funny, but we had to stop calling his name all the time while we were with him.

  2. Thanks! Except it’s all Johns. Our garden consists of a pot of jalapenos and 2 small cucumber vines, desperately trying to find something to grab on to, with a couple of flowers each.. but I have high hopes for future pickles.

    That Tyrone poop thing is hilarious. It’s what our Tyrones spend most of their time doing, so it kind of makes total sense! Poor Real Life Tyrone, he has no idea what his name actually stands for..

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