Plum Bumpkin



AAAAAAAAAH! Someone FINALLY googled the phrase “nudie tubes” and got my website!!! YEAH YEAH YEAH YESSSS!

My #1 longest standing favourite word combo. Ah man.. it makes it all worth while. PIZZA CAT CELEBRATION!

Today in the week of Kara, business was as usual. I got older though on the 11th! CB made me chocolate cupcakes in pirate theme papers and we stood in the kitchen at 11pm smothering them in baileys whipped cream and eating.. nearly all of them.

For my birthday present I got a selection of very stinky cheeses! And a few chocolates with weird things inside of them like feijoa vodka, masala spices and blackberry vinegar or something like that. I ate them at night in the dark while they sat melting on my warm stomache, not the most sophisticated way of eating chocolate but it was fun to guess which one I was eating.

I also got to eat WHATEVER I WANTED! FOOD FREE FOR ALL! So that meant morning coffees at La Voie Francais on Dominion Road, for really proper french goodies. The snooty but nice french lady who owns it served our coffees with little macarons for my birthday. They were crisp and tender, with creamy ganache inside. We also shared an Epi Lardon, a small baguette with cheese and hunks of smokey bacon inside. The bacon fat melts into the chewy bread around it’s and it’s probably the most addictive thing to eat ever. I had a cravatte, which is a long thin loaf of brioche, baked with custard and chocolate chips inside! It was hard to share.  Everyone walking passed us shared a look like “oooh we’re all getting fatty little treats!”. It was a nice way to spend the morning.

For lunch I went we had CARLS JR, BITCHES! They have this thing, which is a sourdough bread grilled cheese with mayonnaise and a hamburger inside! It was way way too much and I literally saw blood pressure stars while eating it.. they had a bucket of sweet tea by the pop dispenser, with a jug of sugar syrup to sweeten it, which I thought was nice for a fast food chain. I drank a buttload. For dinner CB made crispy pork with sweet chili sauce and lettuce, with cheese and pears for dessert. And I’ve been recuperating from the binge eating day all week.

Today is so gray and the air pressure is heavy, it’s threatening to rain any minute. I haven’t showered and CB and I are chilling out our stank bods on the couch feeling restless and slightly irritable. I think it’s the weather. I keep trying to be gung ho about stuff, wanting to clean, or go do something.. but am just fighting the urge to nap all day. We walked the perimeter of the house, checking on plants and flirting with the idea of weeding and cleaning up the yard.. but just came back in here. I did find some neat things though!

Look at this tiny little guy! Little green ninja the size of a button!

There’s grape vines growing all over the side fence. Every week I take one, plop it in my mouth and then made a face. CB finally told me today that I will know when they’re done when they are red.. cause they are red grapes… oy veh

The neighbors have a mossy old tree just covered in purple plums. They are not interested in them and have invited us to go crazy harvesting them up!

They are a gorgeous garnet colour inside, and make your lips pucker. Soon they shall be MINE!

There are tons of giant yellow zucchini blooms, the size of my hand!

But the best thing I disovered this morning, was underneath the lemon tree.. I saw it this morning after breakfast and thought, hang on is that what I think it is..

It’s a giant ginger plant! Soon those flowers will turn red, and they smell goooorrgeous. You pull up the giant stalks and the root is a big old dirty hand o’ ginger ! John has been talking about making ginger beer, now we can make it for FREE! WOOO! Ginger and lemon, growing side by side. I love NZ!


Author: Kara Lalalala

I write this blog for my family cause I am terrible at letters & emails.

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