Morning Coffee Ramble


A beautiful breakfast meats flower that blooms in my tummy.

Its about 11 am and Im sitting at my new desk in my cold little blue “painting room”. Its very sunny and my view out the window is of snow covered rocky granite hills. My feet are cold on the linoleum floor despite my double sock protection so Im alternating which one stays on the floor.  I’m listening to youtube videos of a girl quietly speaking korean, talking about face creams. It’s super relaxing. I can hear CB in the other room talking to his brother about motorcycles. We got up early, but not earlier than the sun today, thank god. CB made a nice breakfast and I made some weak ass coffee. Our plans for the day are minimal, being as it is sunday. I’d like to clean up and go for a walk by the ocean later. It’s not too cold out, just snowy. Contemplating another coffee.

I’m glad we went away to NZ for millions or reasons but the one Im thinking about today is that it made me appreciate snow again. In the city, snow wasnt fluffy white and romantic, it was grey sludge that made everyone miserable buttholes and really screwed up your day. Especially if you’re an idiot who rides her bike to work through it every day. Yesterday when CB drove me to work in the dark there was a blanket of snow on the ground a foot deep. It’s been so so so so windy here lately but the air was very quiet and not very cold. We could tell we were the first people to drive on the road because there were no tire tracks at all. We felt a tinge of guilt for some reason at that, like we wrecked the purity of white that was going on. Later at work I went out of the kitchen to the outbuilding to grab some more molasses and the sight of all that white around me literally made me gasp. I forgot how beautiful snow is! ITS SO COOL! I’m totally gay for snow right now.

CB has been taking care of the two newfie dogs at work a couple of times a week. He takes them for long walks, and is training the boy-dog or.. man dog.. how to pull carts. He loves it! He puffs out his chest and looks so noble pulling his cart of wood all around. It was nice to go outside in my chef whites and look out over the snowy landscape around me, at the blue blue ocean, and see CB and two fluffy dogs bounding around so small way out in the distance. When I came into work in the morning my oven wasnt working, the freezer had gone down and my frustration levels were mounting and it wasnt even 5:30 am yet.. but being able to go outside and see insane beauty for some reason takes all my stress away! And I remember, it’s just desserts, calm down and just make some nice stuff. And then I do it. And then I eat it. And then my blood feels restless, like it wants to get into a mosh pit and F some S up! Ya know! F some S Up! F IT!

Anyway… I better go drag my mangy ass into the shower. Woo the smell of me! It was a long work week and I am ripe. Last night we both got home late and were so tired. I vaguely remember heating up a tiny frozen pizza for dinner. But first nearly burning down the house because I cranked the oven to 425 and didnt realize the oven was full of breadcrumbs from the previous nights dinner debacle. I murdered them.. they were beyond toast. I think I created a new breadcrumb based form of carbon. Bah. I probably could have thrown some cheese on it and ate that though, would have been tastier than the McCain brand LIE that we ate. It was more like a large pizza flavoured cracker, improved slightly by the 1/2 brick of mozza and jar of olives I dumped on it. ANYWAY! Frozen pizzas only digest into regret and weird, uncomfortable dreams. Today is grocery day, so tonight we’ll dine like KINGS!

And a queen.. Yeah..


Sandy Cove


The beach is the best. A couple of weeks ago a gal I work with and I went to a little beach here called Sandy Cove to collect seaweed for a dessert. It was a pretty little beach but we were there on business, even if we didnt look very business with our trusty bucket and pants rolled up to our knees, so I didn’t get to explore as much as I would have liked. CB doesnt have the day off with me so I thought I’d waste a few afternoon hours trawling around the beach picking up gross things.






Like a proper adventurer I stuffed my pockets full of Fudgee-o’s for the road, slung a camera around my neck and I was ready to go. Blasting Prince and blazing down the road in my Buick, all sunshine and rainbows, feeling mighty good. Sandy Cove is in Tilting, which is a little Irish community about 10 minutes from here. It’s a nice drive and I always imagine it must be just full of caribou in the night, it’s nice and marshy with lots of pine to hide in.


The beach is such an exciting place for me. There is always a sense of drama and impending discovery. I’m always so certain that the dark mass up ahead is going to be a seal and it turns out to be old underwear or something. I was so excited thinking there was a cool bone up ahead I went scampering off to it only to discover it was just a piece of plastic siding off some poor bastards house. Damn it!


Thought it was a hip bone and a cool ribbed shell.. it was some paper towel and some plastic.


Never has anyone poured over an old rug with such curiosity before. You can only imagine what I thought this was gonna be from 100 feet away:


Everything could be a seal friend, a cool bone, an awesome fossil, or treasure! 150% of the time it is old moldy garbage. I never stop hoping though. Actually one time it was an actual seal, but it was incredibly dead. It was a little eyeless balloon of sea stink rot looking ready to burst. I ran away.

Like when I was little and found a gigantic bone in the creek and nearly exploded with joy FINALLY I FOUND A DINOSAUR BONE I knew I would, I always felt I would. I brought it all the way home only to have my dad tell me it was a cows femur. Oh the disgust and disappoint. Looking back that was still cool though..



Looking out onto the slow rippling waves was relaxing until I had to pee. After that everything on the beach was done with such a sense of urgency, I can tell you.


The water flowing into the ocean looked exactly like beer and was making me thirsty for drunkeness.


Check it out! I did find a bone! And I touched it! Now I have boneitis.


Mmmm frothy beer stream…



This crab shell looks like a man with chubby cheeks going “Hey Guys! Where’s my legs at!”


I found this nice smooth black bit of charcoal that had been rubbed away by the sea. I nearly ate it from my pocket mistaking it for a bit of cookie.


Someones sad memory of a sand castle.


So I spent a couple of hours taking pictures of crab exoskeletons and splashes of interesting coloured moss on rocks and what not until it started looking like rain. I thought I’d nip into Tilting and take a couple of pictures. I felt like a nobhead tourist wandering around with a camera though so I didnt take many pictures even though it’s a very beautiful little town.IMG_5593

Now Im going to spend the rest of my alone time drinking copious amounts of tea and listening to my records quite loudly. I might even stare out the window at the rainy sunday afternoon WHILE I sip my tea. Im a real wild one.





Noodle Poodle

Grocery Day!

Oh I love this barmy farmy life!

I was out of bed at 6am, calling the fam while CB got a wee bit of a sleep in. It was nice to talk to my mom and sister, and talk to my dad about stars and solar panels. Je suis miss them. Then I realized I had accidentally locked the cat flap so the cat had flapped all over the floor instead. So.. bit of a clean up was required. And then by 7:45 we were out in the rain in our “gumboots” and rain slickers to feed the pigs. I stole all my food scraps home from work so they had all kinds of nice little bread heels, tomato bums and avocado shells to munch on. And then we gave the ducks their oatmeal and filled up their water bowl. They are looking pretty dirty lately, hopefully all this rain will rinse them off a bit, dirty little duckies. We let the poodle ladies out for a pee and then we were off to the Avondale sunday market!

On the way we grabbed a couple of cheap cheese and mince pies and a rum ball from the bakery, and two flat whites from a coffee truck, to sustain us on our market journey. Because it was pissing down, there was nobody there, and it was awesome! Usually Im squeezing my way through the crowd, body checking old Chinese ladies and its every man for themselves. It was nice to just meander, and see who had the best prices. We got all the veg in that picture up there, including 2 huge cabbages and a big $1 bag of apples for the pigs, for $16. Not bad.

And then we went to The Mad Butcher.. Oh my.. we nearly over did it. We got a huge, beautiful scotch fillet roast, a big old pork shoulder for pulled pork, 4 lovely steaks, and a pound of bacon. Mmmm mmmeat. So thats us sorted for the next couple of weeks, nice fresh stuff, on the cheap. Makes me so happy to have a fridge packed full of colours. Its a bit of a “thing” of mine actually, my obsession with fridges. My dad always said I’ll be at home wherever I am as long as there’s a fridge there. I like food…..

Gail’s beauteous little eggs

ANYWAY! Lunch time rolled around and I fried up some of that salty salty bacon and poached some nice eggs, plunked them on some rye bread toast and smothered them in some home made hollandaise. Add a cup of tea and thats pretty much heaven. For dessert I ate about 55,000 tiny mandarin oranges because I bought about 4kg of them at the market. I have no self control when it comes to mandarins and clementines and will probably develop a little orange ulcer because of it. Halfway through lunch Gail dropped by with some eggs for us from one of her hens. She thought she had lost one for the last couple of weeks but yesterday found her living in a tree with 14 eggs underneath her. And now we have six of them, WAHAHAHA!

The rest of the day was quite lazy. I boiled myself like a lobster in the bath upstairs for a good hour which was extremely relaxing. And then Ive just pretty much been a noodle, laying here covered in poodles, in front of the fire, while CB makes me a steak dinner. Steaks, covered in the hollandaise leftover from lunch, and roast kumera. This is so very, totally, the life, dude.